Codependency. It may seem romantic, needing someone every second of the day. But it’s not. It’s dangerous. It can strip you of who you are at your core and turn you into someone else.
When I was in grade 12, I became infatuated with a boy. He seemed to fill in all of my gaps, and because of this, I always needed him around. I couldn’t do anything or be anywhere without him. He felt like the puzzle piece I thought I was missing.
He used to stay with me in the library after school until it came time to catch the bus to work. He used to tell me to text him when I got to work, so he could make sure I was safe. I always did. He had this way of making me feel safe.
Valentine’s Day, known universally as the day of love. While couples scramble to plan a perfect day to show their love for their significant others, single people are blatantly reminded of their single status.
Are you alone this Sunday? Alas, no fear, my single companions. I have composed a guide on how to have the perfect Valentine’s Day, alone or with your friends.
Before I dive into the intricacies of how to be single on Valentine’s Day, there is one rule and one rule only that everyone must abide by. NO SELF-PITY ALLOWED. You’re not allowed to pity yourself or bemoan your single status or think about how you’re going to be a spinster with a thousand cats. Nope. Not today!
Being single is great. You don’t have to tell a significant other where you’re going or justify your actions to them. You don’t have to think twice about wanting to stay in on a Saturday night. In fact, if you want to stay in, you simply can. Being single means being free.
Whether you’re blissfully in love or you roll your eyes every time you see another piece of Valentine’s Day propaganda, sometimes all it takes is a little nudge to get you into the spirit of the season. With that in mind, here are our top 20 Best Romance Movies to indulge in while you knock back on the cinnamon hearts, smell the roses, and pretend that you didn’t just singlehandedly eat an entire box of chocolates.
Bridget Jones’ Diary
If you’re tired of the typical female protagonists in many romantic movies, Bridget Jones will be your new best friend. Jones is middle-aged, single, a smoker, an alcoholic, full-figured, and completely endearing. René Zellweger is hilarious as the offbeat Bridget Jones, who is trying to turn her life around as she attempts to quit smoking, exercise more, achieve career success, and find the right
When my co-worker told me that he could take my shift so long as I bought him a beer, I knew he had an ulterior motive. But I agreed to it.
Sure enough, it was his way of tricking me into a date. His asking me to go for a beer meant that we could speak one-on-one without the eyes of our coworkers judging, questioning, or assuming.
I didn’t know how to react to him asking me out, so I asked my mom what she thought. She told me that I should nowhere in the text message mention that I hate beer.
“Give him a chance—he seems sweet! Realistically, what else are you doing?” Dammit, Ma, look at what you got me into…
Our “date” came to an end. I drank two virgin Shirley Temples and listened to his combination of scheming pickup lines and flattering compliments.
But then he said, “I think you’re beautiful and really fun to hang out with. I wouldn’t ask you this if I didn’t have a really good time tonight…” He licked the residual beer foam off of his glass and looked up. “Would you want to take this further?” I knew it. All this time, he just wanted to sweet talk me into bumpin’ uglies with him.
Who do you love and appreciate most in your life? Family, friends, celebrities, and your personal role models probably come to mind first… but what about yourself? Do you truly love yourself for who you are, and not how you want others to see you? This has a little to do with humility, and a lot to do with what constitutes true and honest values towards personal identity.
You’ve heard it all before, about loving yourself and not letting others change your perceptions of yourself. Easier said than done. We are all capable of putting up a façade of complacency and coolness in regards to how we view ourselves, but let’s not play around. What others think of us matters, and this affects how we feel about ourselves.
Learning to love yourself takes time and effort and is probably still ongoing for us all. The process is different for everyone, although it usually involves discovering and embracing what you enjoy most. That was certainly the case for me, and it’s only been a recent occurrence in my life.
I was (and still am) a quiet individual, so I didn’t get as involved in school as I would’ve liked. My childhood was happy, but not very exciting—lots of video games, comic books, and creative expression. However, this lifestyle didn’t completely satisfy me. I saw my friends play sports and go on exciting vacations while I was stuck doing the same old stuff. What I loved to do just didn’t seem like it was enough, which made me doubt myself. Attempting to compensate through name-brand clothing and a cocky attitude didn’t help much either. I didn’t appreciate who I truly was, but who I thought that I wanted to be.
Although I don’t accept everything about myself completely, as there are always aspects of ourselves that we can improve, I do appreciate the strengths of my character. Through volunteer opportunities and roles of responsibility, I learned to exercise my creativity and my desire to make the world a little bit better. Although I enjoy quiet time, getting involved in the community taught me that I was more capable than I realized. This newfound confidence allowed me to explore more international experiences and challenge myself.
Learning to love yourself starts when you accept your weaknesses. I’m skinny, awkward, geeky, pretty weird… but I’m okay with those traits, because they define who I am right now. That doesn’t mean that I don’t want to improve, but I recognize that I can embrace my quirks and still achieve success. I love myself—moderately, of course. I know that I’m unique and have important ideas and skills to offer.
That can be for you as well. If you recognize your own faults but still challenge yourself in spite of them, then you deserve to be proud of yourself. Get involved, embrace your passions, and you will be rewarded. Love others, and you will be loved… but learn to love yourself, too.
You are in my thermos on my commute to campus. As I walk into Davis or North, and the red Tim Horton’s sign reflects into my glasses, you are the first thing I want – especially for those rough 9am classes. I need you before class, I need you after class, I need you in between classes, after my workouts, and as soon as I get home. University students pre-juice before parties, but I pre-tea. Let’s not forget the time we spend together at meals: breakfast, lunch, dinner, and tea time.
“Three teas a day keep the doctor away” is my mantra. Sometimes, I have four to maintain my health.
Steeped, Green, Orange Pekoe, English Breakfast, Earl Grey, Chai – you have so much personality. I love you no matter what name you take, and I like to switch up my tea order to fit all your faces into my day. Most of my income and my OSAP are probably spent on you, and I want you to know that that’s okay. I want you to know that I will always be here for you as you are for me. I will even debit or VISA you when I’m out of change. You’ve been with me through the good times and the bad, and I want to thank you for that.
Remember that night we spent together in the library? You were piping hot and steamy when I peeled back the plastic Tim Horton’s lid to let you breathe. You held my hand and warmed me to the core as I fired up my laptop to write an English paper. I drew you to my lips and immediately my body pulsed with energy. You made sure I stayed awake to meet my deadline. We were on the fourth floor until midnight together. Let’s just say, my lipstick ended up all over you.
Some of my friends don’t understand though. They say you make me nauseous. They say you have too much caffeine in you. They say I should stop seeing so much of you. I’ve tried to explain to them that we’re soul mates, me and you. And they’ve seen that without you, I can’t function. I wander from class to class like a zombie until I’ve had you at least once.
Sometimes I wonder if you love me back. Do you think about me before you go to sleep, and when you wake up? Do you trust me? Do you talk about me to the other teas, or even coffees? Could you live without me? You are the love of my life and I would never trade you for any other hot beverage in the world. I just need to know if you feel the same.
The day we met, I knew you were the best thing to happen to me since chicken nuggets. The first time I held you, I was blown away…no plastic, no bumpy keys. I could type and type and type without having to hear that hideous ‘click’ sound that pressing buttons makes. Your pictures makes the world look like a better place. And your front camera, oh, that front camera…it’s done wonders for my selfies! You never scare the living sh*t out of me when you vibrate, which, sadly, I can’t say for the others in my past. You rid me of that useless obsession, BBM, and for that, I can never thank you enough. You’re so caring…You inform me of the weather conditions before I leave the house so I’m never stuck in flats on a snowy day.
I won’t butter you up too much though. We’ve had our fare share of issues and there are some issues that I just can’t ignore. You frustrate me when you run out of battery in the middle of the day (even on those days when I barely use you) and when you quit apps mid-game. Sometimes you shut off for no good reason and leave me baffled. Why would you do that, iPhone? And when I’m in a heated argument, you keep cramping my style. ‘Shot’ and ‘duck’? Are those new swear words or something? I really thought you knew me better.
Regardless, I know that nothing is perfect, and I wouldn’t be able to do without you, iPhone. People may talk trash and say I can do better, but they don’t understand what we have. I hope that one day you will learn to accept my friend, Flash player, but until then, I can deal with loving you guys separately.