The End of Year Blahs

 

It’s that time of year again. You know, when there are more deadlines than there are weeks of class left.  When we’re in that awkward phase between winter and spring where there’s snow out so you think you should wear a jacket, but it’s getting warm so you really don’t want to. When you spend too much time in the library and forget what daylight looks like. When you wonder if you’ve ever had a social life.

Sound familiar? You are not alone!

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Humans of UTM

Fourth Year, Political Science

“Law school is my ultimate goal. I want to stand up for people who are oppressed. I want to stand up for people who face barriers. I feel like you can’t judge a person by their social status or what they wear or whatever. The only thing that people should be judged by is who they are on the inside and what they have to offer to the world. It really frustrates me when I see injustice happening. Everyone should have the liberty to do what they like, regardless of your personal opinion and if anyone is oppressed from that, you have to stand up for that.”

A Peek Inside The Mind of a 19-year-old Going On 20

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There are 253 days until I leave my insecure teenage self behind and enter the world of twenty-somethings.

From what I’ve read, heard, and seen of the world, your teenage years are the years you spend drowning in heartache and regret, yet somehow you reach the climax of your 19th year pining for every ounce of that agony back just so you don’t have to turn 20.

My Facebook feed is constantly prompting me to read “Things everyone should know before they turn 20” and “Things all 20-somethings regret” (suggestions I rarely follow, might I add), and it just pushes me to wonder what it is about putting a two and a zero together that suddenly makes life so particularly daunting.

While I’ll admit to being influenced by the big two-o in some sense or the other, it certainly isn’t in a way that makes me want to flee back to “When you’re fifteen, and somebody tells you they love you, you’re gonna believe them…” No sir, I’m fine, thank you very much!

Well, see, looking back on my insecure teenage self, I see that I spent precisely five years of my teenage life buried in self-loathing, jealousy, insecurity, and entirely too much bitchiness. It was terrible, and I mean terrible as in abominable, repulsive, egregious, deplorable, and horrifying. I was left with only one year (not even) to snap out of my sorrowful state and get real.

I won’t go into the details of what changes came about when I snapped out of it, for the sake of avoiding regurgitating self-help books and motivational gurus. But all I want to say is that, thinking of my twenties doesn’t make me want to hide in a corner with my tail tucked between my legs.

It makes me picture a time when I can finally take control of my own life; a time when I can finally live up to my own expectations (because, really, that’s when you please yourself and everyone around you the most). When I imagine my twenties, I see myself working hard – not just at school, and not for the sake of competition – but for the sake of thriving on the feeling that hard work and its results inspire. I see myself standing tall and feeling independent. I see myself one step closer to achieving my goal of becoming a writer (whether I write fiction, news, or reviews — whatever). I see myself finally becoming the woman my 13-year-old-self dreamed of: One in control of her own life.

(See what I mean by “sounding like a self-help book”?)

I Hereby Profess My Love

 

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Dear Tea,

I need you with every fibre of my being.

You are in my thermos on my commute to campus. As I walk into Davis or North, and the red Tim Horton’s sign reflects into my glasses, you are the first thing I want – especially for those rough 9am classes. I need you before class, I need you after class, I need you in between classes, after my workouts, and as soon as I get home. University students pre-juice before parties, but I pre-tea. Let’s not forget the time we spend together at meals: breakfast, lunch, dinner, and tea time.

“Three teas a day keep the doctor away” is my mantra. Sometimes, I have four to maintain my health.

Steeped, Green, Orange Pekoe, English Breakfast, Earl Grey, Chai – you have so much personality. I love you no matter what name you take, and I like to switch up my tea order to fit all your faces into my day. Most of my income and my OSAP are probably spent on you, and I want you to know that that’s okay. I want you to know that I will always be here for you as you are for me. I will even debit or VISA you when I’m out of change. You’ve been with me through the good times and the bad, and I want to thank you for that.

Remember that night we spent together in the library? You were piping hot and steamy when I peeled back the plastic Tim Horton’s lid to let you breathe. You held my hand and warmed me to the core as I fired up my laptop to write an English paper. I drew you to my lips and immediately my body pulsed with energy. You made sure I stayed awake to meet my deadline. We were on the fourth floor until midnight together. Let’s just say, my lipstick ended up all over you.

Some of my friends don’t understand though. They say you make me nauseous. They say you have too much caffeine in you. They say I should stop seeing so much of you. I’ve tried to explain to them that we’re soul mates, me and you. And they’ve seen that without you, I can’t function. I wander from class to class like a zombie until I’ve had you at least once.

Sometimes I wonder if you love me back. Do you think about me before you go to sleep, and when you wake up? Do you trust me? Do you talk about me to the other teas, or even coffees? Could you live without me? You are the love of my life and I would never trade you for any other hot beverage in the world. I just need to know if you feel the same.

Yours truly,

Christine

A Love Letter to My iPhone

 

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Dear iPhone,

The day we met, I knew you were the best thing to happen to me since chicken nuggets. The first time I held you, I was blown away…no plastic, no bumpy keys. I could type and type and type without having to hear that hideous ‘click’ sound that pressing buttons makes. Your pictures makes the world look like a better place. And your front camera, oh, that front camera…it’s done wonders for my selfies! You never scare the living sh*t out of me when you vibrate, which, sadly, I can’t say for the others in my past. You rid me of that useless obsession, BBM, and for that, I can never thank you enough. You’re so caring…You inform me of the weather conditions before I leave the house so I’m never stuck in flats on a snowy day.

I won’t butter you up too much though. We’ve had our fare share of issues and there are some issues that I just can’t ignore. You frustrate me when you run out of battery in the middle of the day (even on those days when I barely use you) and when you quit apps mid-game. Sometimes you shut off for no good reason and leave me baffled. Why would you do that, iPhone? And when I’m in a heated argument, you keep cramping my style. ‘Shot’ and ‘duck’? Are those new swear words or something? I really thought you knew me better.

Regardless, I know that nothing is perfect, and I wouldn’t be able to do without you, iPhone. People may talk trash and say I can do better, but they don’t understand what we have. I hope that one day you will learn to accept my friend, Flash player, but until then, I can deal with loving you guys separately.

Yours truly,

Karuna Israni