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To Speak or Not to Speak: Your Capacity to Act in the Face of Authority

Christine Sharma

 

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I believe that power relations exist everywhere. Our lives as university students are riddled with them. Profs, parents, bosses, friends—our relationships with these people question our beliefs and what power we hold every day.

Personally, I can be short -tempered. Little things that people say, although I smile on the outside, can completely set me off on the inside.

Perhaps your beliefs are being questioned, or perhaps an authority figure in your life said something offensive, but if you’ve ever had an instance where your mind is screaming, “That’s unfair!” or, “That’s wrong!” or, “What did she just say?!”, you’ve probably experienced being set off too.

But when your prof or your mom or your boss or any figure holding authority in your life offends you, what should you do? If you speak up, what if the prof holds a grudge, or your mom doesn’t speak to you, or your boss fires you? All thoughts that rush through my head. And all manageable.

But it depends on the situation.

When a prof made me feel ridiculous in front of my entire class last semester for asking a simple question, I responded by writing a blog post, and even pasted the link to the post into my comments during course evaluations.

When one of my managers told me that I broke a speaker that I actually didn’t touch, I made a sarcastic comment.

On the contrary, when my mom tells me to clean the house… Well, I clean the house.

In my experience, we can speak out against situations that anger or offend us. I usually ask myself two general questions before voicing my opinion:

1) Is it worth it?

2) What’s the worst that could happen, realistically?

If you can’t handle the worst, you probably aren’t ready to handle the situation. I suggest taking a deep breath, and re-evaluating the situation. To comply or not to comply, to speak or not to speak—a moment’s thought can change how you respond to being offended, and how you respond reflects a little bit of you. What kind of person are you? What kind of person do you want to be?

We are all being shaped as people in our university experience. Our compliance is tested through how we interact with authority in our lives.

More often than not, I choose to stand up for my beliefs.

What situation will elicit a voice from you?

The Midterm Mission

Samina Sultana

 

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Professors understand the responsibility of postsecondary students. They have readings and assignments for multiple classes, studying, work, sleep, exercise, and hopefully time for socializing. So, to make things easier, they decide to ask students to demonstrate all that they’ve learned at the same time.

This month, as well as the next one, needs structure to keep things on track. Create a schedule, but don’t finalize it. Take the time to study and review notes, but keep an hour or two free.

 

Know What You Need to Study

  • Visualize this. Add the dates and times on a calendar.
  • What do you need to do for each class?
  • How long will it take (approximately) to complete? Manage this from now until the midterm.
  • Make sure you keep track of what’s completed.
  • Give yourself enough time to learn the information and review it. Flashcards, repeating key words, and rewriting notes.
  • What does the teacher repeat?
  • If you have any last minute questions, email the professor as soon as you have them, or a week before the midterm, for enough time to get a reply and review the material.

 

Prioritize What’s Important

This isn’t just school related. It includes time to sleep, eat, exercise, meet friends and family, and share the laughter, the joy, and the tears over all the work.

Now, not everyone can stick to a schedule. This is why it’s important to leave a few hours free to relax.

In terms of midterm preparation:

  • What is your first midterm?
  • Which parts of the course do you know best? Review it first and last.
  • What section(s) still needs work?

This isn’t about what you can put off. It’s about realizing what you can study and managing the time to learn it.

Also, multitasking can be counter-productive. You are viewing more than one thing and dividing your attention.

 

An Hour a Day

Take at least an hour a day for yourself. Just 60 minutes to do something relaxing. There is such a thing as studying too much and an overflow of information can lead to a collapse of sanity, sleep, and happiness.

Catch up on your favourite show, watch a movie, exercise, or listen to music. Something that’ll help you relieve stress.

 

Rewards

The minute that midterms are over, it’s time to celebrate. Most people want to sleep and that is understandable. But what do you want to do more than anything, after all the hard work you’ve done?

This doesn’t have to wait until the end of all your midterms. You can reward yourself for finishing a chapter or your essay, or sticking to your schedule. Positive reinforcement will keep you motivated.

 

Create a Study Group

Dividing up the work and reviewing it with other people lessens the work you have to do and talking it over will help you learn the material.

You can come up with possible questions, ask for help, go over notes, and quiz each other.

The year 2015 and the midterms—with multiple tests within the same week or day just hours apart—show no signs of slowing down or getting more manageable, so take these scheduling tips and strive for nothing but the best.

Perhaps There’s Hope…

Darren Clift

 

You don’t hear about many acts of kindness in the world today; sadly, stories of tragedies and heartbreaks outsell ones of happiness and hope. It seems like unrequited generosity is a lost art to most people, and that is a troubling thought. We all have the capacity to do more for others, but we just as easily make excuses
as to why we can’t do those generous things. An unfortunate cycle that
perpetuates over and over again.

Senior
citizens are often the undeserving victims of this uncaring behavior. They are considered
by some to be fragile, naïve, obstructive, and are treated as such. We have all
been guilty of avoiding a senior instead of assisting them at some point in our
lives. We immediately regretted the decision, but we have sacrificed doing the
right thing to avoid feeling embarrassed. We know better now (or we should), but
we may not choose to act on our insight when a situation presents itself. We
let our own dilemmas distract us from doing the right thing sometimes, which is
a trait we all share that demands improvement.

However,
there are people in our communities that embody selflessness and humility; we
all know and admire one person in our lives who are just like this. These aren’t
just good people, they’re great ones who do what’s right without expecting
compensation. They respect others in equal measure, regardless of differences
in age, physicality, or appearance. You don’t hear stories of their efforts
published in newspapers, but that doesn’t discourage their will to give back.

My
grandmother briefly met someone like this last week. She was at the nail salon,
waiting for her appointment, when a man entered. He had an appointment before
my grandmother, and apologized for making her wait. My grandmother thought
nothing of it, but thanked him anyways. After my grandmother had been served
and was at the register to check out, the owner of the salon told my
grandmother that she didn’t need to pay him anything. My grandmother,
perplexed, asked why. The owner revealed that the man from before had paid for
her $25 treatment. Unannounced, he did something incredibly kind for my
grandmother that she won’t soon forget. A kind gesture from a stranger, one that
most of us wouldn’t have even considered to do in the first place, made my
grandmother’s day. She has recounted it to anyone who will listen to her since.

To
the gentleman whose generous action put a smile on my grandmother’s face: your
unrequited kindness has made an impression on my family that is truly inspiring,
and for that we thank you. Acts of respect like yours prove to everyone around
you that they too can become a better person like you with ease. Your humility towards
an elderly woman you didn’t know, without the ego or desire to be formally
recognized for your action, speaks volumes about your extraordinary character.
If only we could all emulate your behaviours on an everyday basis, our
communities and societies would be happier and more prosperous places to live,
work, and participate in. Perhaps there’s hope for us yet; we just have to work
to make it a reality.

So let’s all do our part
for the community. Be the best person you can and learn to accommodate others
who are different or disadvantaged compared to yourself. There’s so much good
in the world—embrace it, and your perspective on life will change, guaranteed.

How Do You Handle Being Called Out?

Marium Faisal

Being called out on behaviour that is deemed unacceptable is problematic
for a lot of people. Being called out doesn’t mean getting your feelings hurt
or someone pointing out something feeble. A lot of celebrities recently have
been called out for saying very problematic things that “uphold the oppression
of a marginalized group of people” (YouTube user Chescaleigh). For many of us
who say and do such things, it is a strong belief that what we say shouldn’t
concern anyone else. We believe it is our right to have freedom of speech because
the Canadian Charter of Rights
protects us. However, once a line is crossed, freedom of speech starts to
become downright insulting and offensive to a marginalized group of people,
whether it be members of a certain race, religion, gender, sexual orientation,
etc.

So how do you deal with being called out? How do you properly apologize
when someone informs you that you shouldn’t say or do what you just did? How do
you handle it when someone calls you out for using the n-word and you’re very
clearly not in any position to be using that word?

Here are a few tips to help make your apology sincere:

1. Don’t become defensive. If anything you
want to say sounds something like, “You take everything so personally,” or, “It
was just a joke,” or, “I didn’t mean it like that”—don’t even think about it.
It is just an indication that whatever else you are about to say will be just
as insincere.

2. Don’t
apologize and then try to justify your actions. Being downright
defensive is one thing, but if you say, “I’m sorry,” and the next word you say
is, “but,” do not go there. Chances are, you aren’t really sorry for what you
said.

3. Understand
where they’re coming from. What they feel is valid because they’re the ones being
oppressed, not you. Ignorance is not bliss. It just means you’re very unaware
of the social structures around you.

4. Don’t take it
personally. The oppression is enacted upon the person calling you out or on the
person you are making jokes about; calling you out is a way to teach you and
educate you—it’s not about trying to make you feel extremely guilty or a
personal attack.

5. Apologize
sincerely. Tell them you’re really sorry and that you didn’t know that it wasn’t
right to say something like that.

6. Make a
commitment to change. Say something along the lines of, “How can I help?” or,
“I won’t do it again! Thank you for informing me.”

7. Remember that
calling someone out isn’t simple. It isn’t easy for someone to gather the courage and
confront you about the things you say that are offensive and oppressive.

8. Work on ways
to help others and be a strong ally to those facing oppression by the greater
social structures around us. Being called out is a way to remind you and
make you more aware. It’s to help you change. What we’ve been taught is
something we all have to unlearn. It will take time, but always be a strong
ally to those around you facing oppression.

Why We All Deserve a Break From Social Media

Hamna Awan

 

Like
many of us, I recently succumbed to the stresses of social media and just quit.
I deactivated my Facebook, said goodbye to the Instagram app, and threw Snapchat
to the curb. I did, however, decide to keep Twitter—mostly because I use it
less for connecting with others and more for complaining about late buses and
the lack of/too much cream in my iced coffee.

There
is such a thing as too much connecting. Constantly updating your social media
on what’s new in your life, seeing everyone else’s updates and pictures of get-togethers,
etc… It’s exhausting.

(Kim
Kardashian voice)

Like,
I’m just over it.

I’m
tired of knowing every little development in people’s lives—whether it be via
Facebook or Instagram—or any little, even moderately exciting thing that
happened to them recently (or that has ever happened to them, via the #tbt hashtag).
I also got tired of feeling the need to update everyone on my life. I mean, I
think there’s a very small handful of people who actually care, and I’d rather
just tell them myself.

Instagram

Am
I the only one who feels the need to scroll through her timeline sometime in
the morning until I’ve reached the batch of old ones I had already seen last
night? It’s a waste of time and I find myself getting bored doing it, but I
feel compelled.

Then
there’s the struggle of having to think of creative ways to take pictures, with
creative angles and creative lighting; I just don’t want to, dammit.

Also,
my food is to eat, not to Instagram. I’ve grown tired of showing the world my
meal before it is viciously devoured by my carnivorous appetite. (On that note,
I’ve also grown tired of seeing everyone else’s meals seconds before their
devourings.)

I
also feel like it takes away from experiences—I want to go back to having a
great time without showing everyone what a great time I had.

Snapchat

If
I’m being honest, I just don’t understand the purpose of Snapchat. I just don’t
get it. I just don’t need/want to know what everyone I know is up to every day.
It’s one thing if it’s something particularly exciting, but the number of
selfies I used to receive and pictures of people holding their coffee or pouting
in front of their books… I just don’t get it. I just don’t.

Facebook

The
big one. The king of all social media. I can’t pinpoint exactly what it is
about Facebook, but it has recently taken up residence on my last nerve.
Perhaps the mindless scrolling and flooding of my mind with everyone else’s
thoughts via status updates and new photo albums has finally gotten to me.

All
in all, I’m just tired. I need some “me” time, time to grow on my own without
the constant watch/influence of 200 followers/followings on me, and I’m really
looking forward to seeing how different my life feels without a heavy online
presence. I’m also well aware that this change will not last forever. This is a
temporary hiatus, not the end of my social media career.

This
is not the last you will see of me, social media.

Pet Best Friends: The One Cuddly Thing Every University Student Needs

Christine Sharma

 

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Mycat and I are best friends.

Sure,
he can be kind of snobby. Sure, he can’t talk to me. And sure, he needs me to
clean up after him from time to time.

But
when I commute home after a day on campus, the one I can count on to greet me
when I walk through the door is my cat, Pippin. Yes, like the Hobbit from the Lord of the Rings trilogy.

In
my opinion, every university student needs a pet. A fish, a dog, a cat, or a
bird; pets can keep you sane. Pippin, for example, cuddles with me. He knows
when I’m feeling down or sick and sits on me to make me feel better.

He’s
always got my back. Whether I’m studying, jamming, or sleeping, I can count on
Pippin to keep me company. He even has a sense of humour—sometimes, he sits on
my laptop and helps me procrastinate with his cuteness. Silly cat, you’re right—I
don’t have to do any work today!

A
pet will hear you out. When your human friends don’t have the time or patience
to listen to your rants, it’s comforting to know that your pet is there for
you. A pet will listen to your problems and offer cuddles and adorable stares
as a solution.

Also,
pets are proven to be stress busting. And between all of the tests, assignments,
midterms, and part-time jobs, I know we value stress busters. Remember how,
during exams, the library brings in puppies for us to pet? This decreases our
stress levels and gives us a break from studying. Imagine having a pet at your
convenience to bust your stress with their plush fur under your fingers.

It’s
great; trust me.

One
thing I especially value about having a cat is that he keeps my parents company
when I’m not home. Their only son, Pippin, ensures that my parents are
entertained throughout the day when I can’t be around.

Think:
what do you look for in a friend?

Call
me needy, but I like good listeners, a good sense of humour, and the ability to
give me constant company and attention.

From
a pet, the soft fur (or feathers or scales) is just a bonus!

The
one constraint about having a pet is having the time to take care of them.
Friendship is a reciprocal act; pets need love and attention, too. And
grooming, and trips to the vet, and lots of your time and effort. If you don’t
have time to take care of a pet, this friendship route may not be for you.

Hopefully, I’ve given you some food for thought in terms of having a pet. Have more pros or cons to having a pet that I haven’t mentioned? Comment below!

The Future Is Uncertain… But That’s Okay!

Darren Clift

 

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Do you have it “figured out”? Do you know what you want to do with the rest of your life, what career you want to have in the future? If you answer yes, you’re
doing something right! For the vast majority of students who say no, don’t fret.
Unless you’re in fourth year—then perhaps “fretting” isn’t such a bad course of
action. It’s normal not to know where you want to go and what you want to do with
your life; choosing to go to UTM was hard enough. Mapping out the rest of our
lives… How the heck are we expected to do that when we can’t even decide on the
foods we want to eat and how we want to pass the time today? In my opinion, not
knowing what you want to do with your life at this very moment is okay; provided
are some examples and statistics that are aimed to ease some of your fears for
the foreseeable future. Of course, if you do currently have clear career goals,
please read on with those in mind; perhaps you’ll learn something that you hadn’t
considered before.

The
majority of jobs that current grade school students will have in the future haven’t
even been created yet. Please do some research online; you will find various
statistics to support this claim in some fashion. The dynamics of economies are
changing in light of technological advances, whether we want them to or not.
That means that you will likely be employed in a job later in your career that
doesn’t even exist yet. How do you even attempt to plan for 10 or 20 years in
the future when we don’t know what the job market will look like at that point
in time? As a UTM student, you have a wide variety of opportunities and events
to network with professionals and learn about the world at large. If you choose
to take advantage of as many of those experiences as you can, you will learn
new skills and advice that will benefit you later in life. Every experience,
good or bad, is a learning
experience; be open to these opportunities and your life may head in an
exciting and unexpected direction. If you have an interest in something, follow
up on it while you still have the time—you never know where it’ll take you.

Our
lives, and indeed the world, will change in ways that we can’t even begin to
understand now. It goes without saying that your career plans will change too.
Very often, reality has a way of hitting us when we least expect it; our lives,
for better or worse, must adapt to those changes. It would be great for life to
play out exactly as we’d like it to, but that’s just not how it goes. How do
you make solid plans for the future when it can all shift so rapidly? That’s
why not knowing your career goals right now is okay; your
life may take an unexpected turn in the road, and your past goals may get replaced
by new ones that are more realistic to your situation. Work hard, confide in
others, believe in yourself, and refuse to give up. You’ll find your way, even though
it might take longer than you’d anticipated.

We will all find our path eventually… Some have
discovered it sooner than others, and that’s okay. The future is uncertain, and
that may seem quite scary to you. You’re not alone; there are probably hundreds
of students at UTM currently that don’t yet know where they want to end up in
the coming years. Don’t be afraid to try new things, to meet people, and to go
in unforeseen directions—easier said than done, but doable nonetheless. You might
just end up where you were meant to be—somewhere new, unexpected, and equally
exciting!

How to: Survive a Long Day on Campus

Christine Sharma

On Thursdays, I start class at 9 a.m. and finish at 8 p.m. I’m at UTM until 11, followed by a three-hour break, and then I commute to Sheridan for two back-to-back three-hour lectures.

Thursdays stress me out.

Long-day students, unite! Whether you have an 11-hour day like me, a 12-hour day, or (scary!) even longer, there are methods of survival for this potentially stressful day (or days D:).

I’ve picked up a few useful tips I wanted to share with anyone reading this from my experience with the 9–7, 9–8, 10–9 types of days.

Have an awesome bag for your stuff

First and foremost, your bag has to be efficient. Obtain a sizeable bag that you are comfortable carrying around all day—not too large or too heavy. Test your bag on your body! My bag is a bottomless pit that slings over my arm or my shoulder.

Ask yourself: Will the bag fit my books, my laptop, and my food?

You’re going to need a water bottle.

There are water bottle refilling stations all around campus. Ensure that your water bottle is always full and you are always hydrating yourself. I have a UTSU water bottle and down at least three bottles of water a day to help me focus and stay energized.

Ask yourself: Will the bottle fit in my bag and remain easily accessible?

Let’s not forget about food.

Hunger can totally make or break your day. Pack food in your bag! Even a bunch of little snacks tossed in your bag will keep you focused. An apple, a granola bar, and some pasta is usually what I keep, and some money just in case I want tea or coffee.

Ask yourself: Will I be full all day?

Your wallet is bae.

Excuse my slang. Your wallet is the key to your day. A few important things to keep in your wallet are your T-Card, your U-Pass, your Presto card, your debit card, and some change. You can’t predict how your long day will unfold, and having transportation options and money on hand really helps you feel independent and able to take on your day. I forgot my wallet on my bed yesterday—that was not a fun 10-hour day.

Ask yourself: Is my wallet in my bag at all times?

Have something to do during any breaks.

Readings, assignments, gym, food. Usually what will keep you going through a break—be sure to pack according to what you plan to use your break for.

In my opinion, long days are all about planning efficiently. Even if you have to make a list of what you need to survive your long day, take five minutes and write reminders for yourself the night before!

For me, the most important part of getting through a long day is in the mind. Don’t think about how long your day is—breathe, and just do it.

Long days are survivable—share your survival tips with me below :). Please… Help…

The Right Way… Or The Easy Way?

Darren Clift

 

“Life is easy,”… said no one seriously, ever! What will you ever learn from treading the path of least resistance, from forsaking what is challenging for what is simple? Not a whole lot. Life isn’t a walk in the park, nor should it be for anyone. Humans are meant to be challenged throughout our daily lives. It keeps our minds honed and prepared for wherever we go or whatever we choose to pursue next. Yet, we don’t think in this way most days; we live busy lives already. What’s the use of going out of our way to do something that we deem a good but unnecessary idea, for ourselves or another person? What’s the use of inconveniencing ourselves today for the gain of someone else or for a goal we have that is many years down the road?

Well, as much as we try to convince ourselves otherwise, the easy way is not always the right way to live our lives in most cases. Fulfillment can rarely be achieved in the same old daily routine; for example: eat breakfast, go to work or school, come home, eat dinner, watch TV, go to bed, repeat. When put in words, the daily routine sounds incredibly boring, and it is! When you can forecast exactly what you’ll be doing in a week’s time, and how each day will more or less play out for you, that’s when you know you’d do well with a little change in your life. It might make your time more constrained throughout the day, but if you have the right attitude, you’ll surely succeed.

Vice versa, the right way will rarely be the easy way to do things. It’s difficult to decipher the difference on days when you’re not in the best of shape, and that is perfectly acceptable. On your off-days, doing things for yourself is often the best course of action for a rapid recovery. But on the days when you’re bright-eyed, bushy-tailed, and as ready as ever to face the day ahead—that’s when you should realize that the easy way should leave you unfulfilled after all is said and done.

So what exactly is the right way to do things, to live your daily life? It’s important to note that “right” is a subjective term; there is no “right” way to do anything, really. Everyone is entitled to their own ideas on what they deem is right for them. What I’m referring to as the “right” way here is essentially being in a state of mind that openly seeks out and accepts opportunities, experiences, and challenges that are outside of your established daily routine (I hope that you agree. If not, please hear me out).

Always having enough tasks or short-term goals to complete throughout the year, aside from the toils of the week, is a way to be proactive, experience lasting fulfillment, and involve yourself in the community. For students, a proactive task that you can start right now is to research and apply for scholarships. Applying for one relevant (and preferably local) scholarship a month is a rewarding endeavor that will inevitably pay off down the road. Alternately, one of the best ways to live life for the right reasons is to do things for others on a regular basis—for your family, friends, neighbours, colleagues, and even complete strangers! Looking for ways to help others that are most deserving almost every day will reward you tenfold.

This could be giving back to the community, helping out a family member or friend with a job that needs doing, or smiling and saying hello to strangers that you pass. Incredibly simple, yet surprisingly difficult for most people, myself included! However, you won’t regret doing it. Stepping outside of your comfort zone, of what comes easy to you, is a very brave endeavour and is something to be proud of.

The hardest part of this “right” lifestyle is finding or rediscovering balance. My suggestion: estimate how much time outside of work or class that you have to dedicate each week to get projects, readings, and other schoolwork completed on time. With the remainder of your time, identify three activities or hobbies you would like to get involved in each week that will still allow you to have some deserved free time. Perhaps you already go to the gym each week; that’s a great start! What else can you get involved in that will keep you engaged with others and allow you to set personal goals, or will be a productive activity that will benefit you down the road? Do your research and don’t be afraid to prioritize your precious time. It’s not going to be easy… But who ever said it was going to be?

Yeah, this has been a long-winded blog, but one that I hope resonates with you. Life is not going to be easy, but live yours to the fullest! Make yours one that you can be proud of when you look back on it. The right way isn’t going to be easy, but the easy way isn’t always right. Be brave, because you can do anything you set your mind to!

12 New Year’s Resolutions to Create and Actually Follow Through On

Hamna Awan

 

1. No more complaining (okay, slightly less complaining).

Try to make the best out of situations. No matter how annoyed you are, just try not to translate that annoyance into words—it honestly makes the situation so much more unbearable than it needs to be.

2. No more procrastination.

I’m talking to you, person reading this blog who should be studying right now. I suppose, then, that I’m also talking to me…

3. Be more social

Take people up on invitations, invite people out, and maintain friendships and relationships so you can stop complaining about how alone you are (am I the only one guilty of this??).

4. Get enough sleep.

No more of that stumbling out of bed 40 minutes before class and rolling into lectures with bed-head, sweatpants, and your breakfast in your hand.

5. Make an effort with your appearance.

You look good, you feel good. Confidence is an investment, and can have a ripple affect on other areas of your life, including, school, friends, romantic relationships, and so on.

6. Make time for a social life.

A little party never killed nobody—although I suppose those who have had a different experience of partying cannot attest to that.

7. Stop worrying about your romantic life (or the lack thereof).

Stop trying to find the right person and start being the right person. Yes, I did read that on Tumblr.

8. Focus on your future.

You’re young now, and you have many opportunities available to you. Don’t get distracted by little things that don’t ultimately matter. Keep in mind the grand scheme of things.

9. Do not define yourself on other peoples’s terms.

You decide who you’re going to be in the world and the kind of place you’re going to occupy in society, and the only standards you need to hold yourself to are your own.

10. Take initiative.

There are opportunities out there, but it’s your responsibility to go out of your way to seek them.

11. Take responsibility for your actions.

If there’s one thing that pretty much never fails to bother me, it’s people who blame the world for their problems (within reason). Taking responsibility for your behaviours and actions can be one of the most empowering things that happen to you—it allows you to realize you have some control in what happens to you in life.

12. Get into shape.

Even if that shape is round.